I have to go to the bingo tonight with Ashley for an article in the press; we have to do two social events where one of us likes the event and the other dislikes and then the reverse. So tomorrow we go to karaoke as Ashley loves that and I hate it….now I don’t really like bingo BUT I do fancy going with Ashley, so it will be fun. Except we will have a photographer there with us, at both situations and that will be weird. Then we sit down and get interviewed about the whole thing.
I sat down today and rehearsed my play, I was scared to do it in case it overwhelmed me, but to be honest I must actually do it as I really need to know the script before a paying audience see it, I have performed this play many times but you do panic. Ashley and I have a sketch show also that needs tightened up, I am doing three shows (plus press events, plus late night gigs) all the way through the festival in Edinburgh from 3rd-28th August and time is drawing near.
Anyway the play is fine, somewhere in my mixed up fucked up memory that play is there!
I imagine my head looks like the inside of a badly managed antique store, broken chairs, stuffed otters, vintage clothes, old vinyl records, pictures of Donny Osmond, photographs of children I don’t know, a three wheeled bike, some bits of comedy sets, shattered thoughts of badly organised day trips, flashbacks of painful drug funerals, murdered mother memories, and horrible nightmares that are tucked up…yet leaking out of a scabby shoebox and forty six old pennies sitting on top of a broken television.
I didn’t even begin to think that my whole play is sitting there neatly wrapped up waiting to be spoken out loud, I am worried sick that when I go to talk on stage that an old broken record will fall out and the leaky nightmare box explodes out of my head and straight into my mouth!

So I actually feel good, I am confident that we will both have a great festival and a great time enjoying the multitude of drama’s that will no doubt unfold.

Last year, I managed to eat sushi and get anaphylactic shock two hours before my show opened and ended up in hospital getting injections to calm my swollen tongue, yet managed to do the show full of adrenaline.

The year before that the police came to my show where I talked about something illegal that I had done and I was shit scared I would get arrested.

The year before that a man tried to throw himself from a high window in a busy street in Edinburgh when he was going through his annual suicide mission and I managed to talk him down and he almost threw himself on top of me.

Things happen to me._
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