I was on late night BBC Radio 5 Live last night discussing ‘cussing’ and swearing on the television. It was 11pm at night and up to the old BBC studios off Great Western Rd…not far from my home. I was all wrapped up with a big scarf, woolly hat and my flask of hot tea waiting on the street for my car to arrive. The streets were empty and frozen.
Before long I was ensconced into the wee basement studio, which was freezing, waiting on the studio giving me a sign they were there for me. The show went well, I was annoyed during the discussion as they talked about Gordon Ramsay, Billy Connolly and myself swearing in our job and I mentioned that ‘wee pukka Oliver’ also swears and therefore is it all right to swear as long its not in a Scottish Accent but delivered in ‘posh tones’.
The studio host took the comment on board, I must have done ok as this morning at 8am I was called by another BBC radio show in London to discuss swearing all over again (I must be the swearing officiando, surprising really as OFCOM accused me of saying CUNT live on C4, turns out it wasn’t me and I they apologised!).
Anyway the radio show called at 8am and asked me to be ready for 9pm and they would call my landline. I promptly fell back asleep and was woken at 9pm by a live studio link! I was half awake, I farted coughed and talked about swearing and was so confused and half asleep I almost swore!
Turns out they loved it and have asked me to do more, I think I talk intelligent when I am sleepy-awake I am shite!
So that was last night and this morning. I am excited as I have good news, my daughter and I will be featured on Sunday Times column Relative Values…I LOVE this column and have read it for nearly twenty years now!
The good news is that Ashley gets to come to London with us…I have been secretly wanting this, albeit she is only there for a few short days. I love being in London with her.
We spent last December in London together, I was performing my one woman show at Soho Theatre and Ashley and I stayed in a hotel for three weeks. We partied at the Groucho, we went shopping through Oxford Street, we watched the Christmas lights being switched on, and we snuggled up in our room, turning up the heater and lay listening to the radio, eating crisps in the dark and went dancing in late night clubs.
I will miss all this, she is my soul mate and I know my daughter shouldn’t be, I should leave her to grow and develop her own pals, but I miss her so much when I am away from her.
I remember the night we laughed our asses off at the Groucho, she got to meet Mark Lammar, he was lovely and drove us home that night, she got to dance in the streets of Soho and even got to sing and laugh with Lois Walsh (X-Factor Judge) as he passed Ashley and her spontaneous dancing gay men who joined the drunken chorus line she started.
Her highlight of the trip was the amazing Peter Kay who greeted her at Heathrow airport for me. I was waiting on her coming though the arrival gate and Peter and I chatted about comedy ( I gigged with him before he was hugely famous!) Peter asked after Ashley and when I explained she was just arriving he waited to see her.
She is still astounded he remembered her from when she did a comedy gig at age 13 with him in Edinburgh fringe 1999. He was so giving and despite his huge fame, took time to chat with her. I love him for that.
So I will miss all that, but then I always have husband with me to argue. That will be worth a blog or two!_